Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Warning: Girly and Mushy Entry
It has happened. It is the 4th week of school now and I finally gave into my real feelings today. I have tried my hardest to always be brave, strong and steadfast in my decision to go back to school. It has taken a lot on my part and I have needed a lot of help from the Lord (as in anything in our lives...but this one seems to need His hand a lot more than other times in my life). This morning as I left the girls at school I started to cry. I was surprised at what a release it was. I have wanted to cry for a while now but I don't let myself do it very often....I am a "get out there and do it" person, therefore I go through the actions without letting myself feel down ever. But I have to say that it felt good to give into my real feelings and be sad that I have to be away from them each day. I have voiced this before but never felt it. This is such a sacrifice, but I know it is the right thing to do. I am grateful to know this through prayer and the Lord's guidance. Also, I am grateful for a supportive husband and that we are on the same page with our preparation for the future. Wow....feels good just to write these thoughts out (which I suspected)....hopefully it helps my family and friends understand me a little better.
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This is exactly how a great mother like you does feel! Its good to be tough, I think. But there is such a sense of relief when you can let it out like that. Everything works out like it should when you're doing what's right. You know that the Lord won't let you go through it alone. Why you couldn't have gone through this while I was you're neighbor we'll never know. I think of how many different ways I could help if only I was there. I know you have other help, probably better help, and that you're more than strong enough to get through these less than perfect times. You're an amazing woman!
ReplyDeleteThanks Brenda! I do wish you guys were still here but I would probably take advantage of you since I am not able to give back much. :) Thank you for saying such nice things. It is comforting to hear some feedback once in a while. Hey.....I am unable to get to your blog....do I need to be invited again? ~Jeffi
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